


Better

by barrisscoffees



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-15
Updated: 2017-06-15
Packaged: 2018-11-14 14:36:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 473
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11210091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/barrisscoffees/pseuds/barrisscoffees
Summary: No one fights in a war without getting a couple of scars.





	Better

Barriss’s footsteps echoed a bit too loudly in the empty mess. Here, with Ahsoka sitting in a singular pool of light at the table she was heading towards, Barriss was reminded of their trip to Ord Cestus and the cold terror of being unable to control her own actions. The closer she drew, the more concerned Barriss became; Ahsoka had not looked up at all when Barriss entered the mess - uncharacteristic of any Togruta - instead, her eyes were focused on the spoon balanced between her fingers. Barriss slid into the seat across from her friend.

“Ahsoka?” Barriss waved her hand, attempting the gain the Togruta’s attention, but Ahsoka remained steadfastly - if absently - staring at her spoon, mouth hanging ever so slightly open. Barriss paused. She had seen this before in young clone troopers after their first few battles. While Ahsoka was no shiny, she was still very young and consequently even more greatly affected by the carnage she witnessed on a near daily basis. 

“Ahsoka!” Barriss tried again, this time punctuating it with a sharp snap. At the sound, Ahsoka’s eyes met Barriss’s but… not quite. Barriss moved as quickly as she could to Ahsoka’s side of the table, Ahsoka’s blue eyes hardly tracking her movements. With trepidation, Barriss moved her hands to rest on Ahsoka’s bare shoulders.

“Ahsoka.” She said for the third time, as gently as she could. “Tell me five things you can hear.” Ahsoka looked away from her, and, for a heart-stopping moment, Barriss worried her tried-and-true method had failed, but there was a tremor in the Force and Ahsoka’s answer followed shortly.

“I hear… the engines of the ship; I hear you breathing,” Barriss could hear both of these, but - true to her species - the next items Ahsoka listed, Barriss could not fathom being able to hear, “the clone troopers talking. A door just closed. And… I can hear the droid from the kitchen.” Barriss moved her hands gently up and down Ahsoka’s arms in an awkward, comforting fashion.

“Good. Now what about four things you can see?” Ahsoka nodded.

“I see my spoon, the door to the mess, the table, and… you.” Barriss swallowed.

“And how about three things you can feel.”

“My spoon is cold. So is the bench. Your hands are on my shoulders.” As Barriss had hoped, Ahsoka’s voice was gaining strength with every observation. 

“Two things you can smell.” Ahsoka took a shuddering breath.

“Not much. Just… the cleaner they use in here and steam from the kitchens.” 

“And one thing you can taste?”

“My ration bar. Although,” Ahsoka met Barriss’s eyes, finally, eyes dimly sparkling, “not much to taste there.” As she was sure Ahsoka intended, Barriss grinned at that and dropped her hands from Ahsoka’s shoulders. 

“How are you?” Ahsoka shook her shoulders and offered Barriss a faint smile.

“Better now.”

**Author's Note:**

> In this fic, I intend Ahsoka to come across as disassociating. For all those who don't know, it is kind of like you stop feeling as if you are part of your body - sort of like everything is a simulation. It is a coping mechanism people often employ during or after extremely traumatic events. More severe cases can lead to split personalities; for example, one personality might form as a protector - someone who can handle the trauma. What Barriss is trying to do is ground Ahsoka in reality by having her focus on things that remind her that she is existing in a space. It is a legit technique that is really useful because it makes you concentrate and you can do it by yourself. Most of the time, "what do you see" would come before "what do you hear," but given Ahsoka's superior hearing, I thought the switch would be appropriate.
> 
> Happy Thursday! I hope you are all having an awesome week! I will be away next week and won't be posting anything, just a heads up. ALSO! I am running low on things to post so if anyone want to give me prompts I'd really appreciate it!!
> 
> Anyways, thanks to all who review or leave kudos, you're the best!
> 
> Much love to thedorkyastra, and thanks to Edith, my good friend, my buddy, my homie.
> 
> Constructive criticism is always welcome!


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